I drew a calendar today. More specifically I drew the months September and October out on the back pages of my journal. There has been so much pulling me lately – personally, creatively, professionally, relationally – pretty much anything that probably ends in “ly”. I also made a list of everything floating around me and I didn’t even bother to count exactly how many bullets there were as A Lot seemed to sum it up sufficiently. I use to make lists all the time. I’m not quite sure where that fell off, I’d guess the biggest sever to that Type A structure was heading south in 2012. You don’t seem to need lists as much when you’re milking cows and changing the sheets on triple bunk beds (yes those are real!!).

I made a calendar and I took my sweet ass time drawing my special little disproportionate squares. I use to care a lot about straight lines and even blocks, and I almost did this morning, but then I just went for it and thought ah whatever fuck it so Sunday’s box is a little bit bigger than Saturday’s, oh well. Don’t pet the sweaty things, and don’t sweat the petty things, right? (except once-upon-a-time this totally bothered me enough to start the project all over / hate it, etc. yay for growth!)

So I made a calendar and relished in letting every slow stroke of my pen matter as I carved out N – O – V – E – M – B – E – R, playing with font and curves. I love that shit. That was one of my favorite parts of being a barista – getting to write pretty things on the boards (and smelling coffee all the time, and smiling at all the customers, and being a bad ass B pounding out the drinks). I recently was flipping through a magazine and got inspired to create a collage for the first time in YEARS. I use to love that shit, too. Snip, snip, snip. Create, create, create. Flow.

I took two hot yoga classes today and they were fucking delicious (apparently my writing potty mouth is feeling loud tonight). Most of the time my #1 comment after class to the instructor is usually, “That was so yummy. Thank you.” Yummy. YUMMY. I love being a student. Hadn’t been to this studio in months. Hadn’t been pulled to heated classes either like this in years. All I wanted to do was be in that hot ass room melting and molding and stretching and strengthening and being. It was great. I sat on the grass by the ocean between classes drawing my calendar, talking to a wonderful girlfriend on the phone, embracing my slow poke solo waves Being Peace and Steady and Soft. Yesterday started with talking to Jack on the phone – “Things To Do Today: Stay Sane” – “Today’s Goal: Don’t Lose My Shit.” (Or Lose It and then Just Do It as Gracefully as possible). Success!

I’m learning to get more comfortable in my body you guys (can you say LIFE GOAL / slowly but surely). Curves and squishiness and strength and all. I was in the gym the other day with just one other chick and even though we didn’t exchange much ourselves I felt like we were both feeling fueled by Being Strong Ass Women. I was head banging on the elliptical and she was doing a push-up circuit. I’ve been letting loose on the work out machines lately. Because fuck it, why not? #loveyourself