Ask and you shall receive.
Ask and you shall receive.
Ask and you shall receive.

Koh Phangan – an island of manifestation. A hub of mermaids, goddesses, magic and power. I am so grateful for the shift that the water, the islands, my time in southern Thailand has brought. Grateful for the strength, centering and laughter I’ve begun to reclaim. Rooting from within.

I’ve seen glimpses of God through strangers. Through the infinite support, love and inspiration my travel sister’s so graciously provide. Fear has loosened it’s grip, and excitement’s slipped into it’s place. I am shedding. I am listening. I am curious. I am here.

I took my first solo adventure out to a Bhajans devotional singing gathering last Saturday night. It was beautiful and empowering simply by the fact that I got myself there. It’s amazing the amount of trust you put into other people as a backpacker, getting into “taxi’s” where you’re not entirely sure if the driver understands where you need to go and how to actually get there, let alone trusting they are well-intentioned human beings who won’t harm you and will get you there in one piece. I amped myself up to get the ride, but once in the bed of the truck, alone, the absence of Jackie and Amanda was potent, my gratitude for them deep. Arriving was a victory in and of itself; I nearly skipped to the meditation hall. 100+ people sat on cushions in a horse-shoe shape around candles, flowers, and pictures, while a handful of others stood or danced freely in the back. A woman on her guitar led us, accompanied by a man with a guitar and another with a drum. Some of the songs were soft, some were celebratory with clapping and gusto, some I simply listened to, putting my hands on my heart, out to the light, up to the sky, soaking it all in.

Exploring night markets, renting motorbikes(!), doing yoga, beach runs, sunset seaside dinners, eating AMAZING food, sleeping in mosquito nets, living in sweat layered on top of bug spray lathered on top of sunscreen. Coming home to lizards on the ceiling, waking up to palm-sized spiders on the bathroom floor, grabbing the go-pro to capture the “bug wars” we have at least twice a day. Iced coffee, fresh fruit smoothies, hikes, incredible views, white sand beaches, expansive conversations, laughter, reflection, clear blue water, a different language being spoken in every direction. This is a dream. This is real life.

Culturally, most of the islands are dominated by tourists and incredibly friendly Burmese workers; Thai locals can be few and far between depending where you go. We found more locals on Koh Lanta, less on Koh Phangan, and nearly zero on Koh Tao. There aren’t any big grocery stores in the south, just a variety of small mini marts like 7-11. They drive on the left side of the road here using stop lights but no stop signs, and regardless of the chaos that ensues there is somehow zero road rage. It’s impressive. You take your shoes off at every store, restaurant and hostel you walk into, which I love. How fun and freeing and natural it is to eat bare foot! Sitting on the floor or dipping my toes into sand. Not a day goes by where I don’t cross paths with a lady boy, or have to move out of the way for a motorbike zipping by. Nutella is popular, wifi is everywhere, and finding what you need is surprisingly easy. Compared to my travels in South America, this is luxury! There are food carts on every corner and fresh food at all the restaurants. I could literally write an entire blog on how truly life-changing / delicious / wholesome / nourishing the food here has been. Holy moly you guys, I never knew it could be so good.

We head to northern Thailand today, beginning a new chapter of the journey. Sun-kissed, relaxed and open, we are ready and excited to see what the jungle has to bring. I hope that wherever you are reading this from, you can find the will to celebrate the small victories in your life. It’s amazing how uplifting they can be, and how powerful it can be to acknowledge your ‘Yes’ moments, your progress, your building blocks. One step at a time we climb mountains y’all. I’ve found myself saying so many times here, with a shrug and a smile, “It’s an experiment!”, trying on new perspectives like clothing, exploring new ideas, ways of living, ways of being, Life as Art. It’s all an experiment. A buffet. Staying attached to nothing, and gaining everything because of it.

Say ‘hi’ to a stranger. Tell the woman next to you how beautiful she is. Cheer on the runner, thank the cashier, leave a note for your server, call a loved one. Support each other. Experiment and experience all the shades and colors and tones around you. Surprise yourself by doing something out of your comfort zone, and smile at yourself for doing so. “Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds…” I danced to this song with three goddesses by my side, smiling, swaying and saying YES to it’s truth.

Sending hugs! Always.